Exploring our Godlikeness on World Mental Health Day

Abraham Maslow wrote: "...Both [creatureliness and godlikeness] are...defining characteristics of human nature... And any philosophy which leaves out either cannot be considered to be comprehensive" (Maslow, 1968, quoted in Schneider & May, 1995, p. 92).

On world Mental Health Day, I want to pay tribute to the ‘Godlikeness’ characteristics within us. The moments I have the greatest privilege to witness in my work with remarkable people who show up every week, willing to confront their demons, dive into sometimes unfathomable pain and work with their creatureliness.

Much of what has to be renegotiated during the course of therapy can be excruciating and overwhelming, there are also moment to moment positive markers that indicate the path towards healing. A lot has been written about resistance, transference, countertransference, triggers and defences in therapy. There isn’t enough curiosity around the other end of these experiences. For every emotional trigger there exists an emotional glimmer that can be used to access regulation. For every sort of resistance there exists 'transformance'- the moment when ‘self meets self’ and all resources and insights align and are experienced as emotional truth (Fosha, 2004). That is the moment of magic- the start of the upward spiral.

When clients reach this stage I often initiate discussions around tapering therapy or discussing new goals. Without exception, I have noticed that they choose to continue therapy and show up with the same frequency. There is an excitement of exploring this new emotional terrain rooted in safety and connection. The conversations are also markedly different. They are not centred around pain but choice.

This is the definition of mental health. The upward spiral. The path towards self-actualization. This is not a temporary expansive state or false positivity. There is an acknowledgement of hard truths and the current realities might still be challenging, but “I see and feel differently now” (as a client put it recently).

Some of these positive affective markers I notice include:

• Tears of joy when a client experiences deep witnessing and acknowledgement of self by self.
• Felt sense of safety and validation in the therapeutic relationship.
• Acknowledgement of own efforts and newfound respect for self.
• Visible relaxation and relief at truly accepting a distressing reality.
• Sense of curiosity instead of rumination/over-analysis.
• Change in posture and frequency of eye-contact and smiling.
• An inclination to contemplate larger truths (beauty, philosophy, literature, etc.)

There is an existential need for recognition in each one of us. We are wired for connection. Modern life is completely unsuited to the way our neurobiology is fashioned and this need is often never met. Organisations are designed to create and sustain anxiety and motivate through fear, social and political systems across the world are crumbling and the family unit is in disarray. These are realities that create roadblocks in the process of finding, establishing and sustaining connection with self and others and experiencing transformance. Fosha defines transformance as “an overarching motivational force, operating both in development and therapy, that strives toward maximal vitality, authenticity and genuine contact.”

Therapy (any therapeutic dyad for that matter) than can be used to create this sense of genuine contact paving the way towards self-actualisation.

I will leave you with the words of Diana Fosha, which sum up what therapy does and most importantly what each human being deserves to experience. If there is a way to heal this world, we have to start with ourselves.

“The roots of resilience…are to be found in the sense of being understood by and existing the heart and mind of a loving, attuned, and self-possessed other.